How Faith Communities Can Intentionally Address Loneliness

Robin Johnson, Clear Lake Presbyterian Church, Houston, Texas

Loneliness is a common problem in the world today. It seems that the more technologically connected we are, the lonelier we become.

Loneliness, while impacting the individual, also takes a toll on society.

To individuals, the health costs of loneliness rival those of being obese or a heavy smoker. For society, the costs exceed $160 billion annually in the United States alone.

It is also worth noting that loneliness is not an issue that is exclusively experienced by older adults. In fact, loneliness doesn’t discriminate. It is not limited by age, race, ethnicity, gender, or income.

In my role as the director of Adult 55+ Ministry at Clear Lake Presbyterian Church, especially following COVID, I am aware the concerns surrounding loneliness and isolation within our congregation, particularly for our older members.

Because of this awareness, I chose to learn more about the challenges and solutions while working on my Older Adult Ministry Capstone Project which I completed as part of the Older Adult Ministry Certificate Program through Columbia Theological Seminary.

My project was titled “Addressing the Issues of Loneliness in Older Adults: A List of Best Practices in Faith Based Settings.” Unsurprisingly, my research affirmed that faith-based organizations have an important and unique role to play in addressing the crisis of loneliness for our members and our community.

There are several advantages that faith communities possess when addressing loneliness. Faith-based organizations are already established in their communities. Familiarity gives faith-based organizations a head start in their impact toward reducing loneliness.

In addition, faith-based organizations often offer other some key program characteristics that can reduce feelings of loneliness. These characteristics include promoting social connectedness and active engagement that give participants the opportunity to develop meaningful relationships, bringing people together for a common purpose, partnering with other organizations in the community on various projects, and providing opportunities for volunteer work that also connects volunteers to those in the community.

In addition to these valuable opportunities, we also offer the unique opportunity to join with the body of Christ to love God and love others.

Ideally, being part of the body of Christ would banish loneliness. Unfortunately, the world is not ideal, and Christians can be lonely. Below are nine intentional steps that faith-based organizations can take to address loneliness.

Best Practices from Research

Provide education aimed at raising awareness about the causes of loneliness and how to alleviate it.

Helping members of a faith community understand that loneliness is not a normal part of aging is a great first step. Teaching people how to take steps to relieve loneliness and actively engage with others, especially if that education involves a mentoring relationship is another effective strategy.

Faith communities leveraging recognized faith tools, like prayer and fellowship, to increase connection is another way that education plays a part in diminishing loneliness.  

Create opportunities for volunteers to connect to the community.

Older adults are often transitioning from a working environment where worth is based on the ability to produce. Creating new connections and ways to identify themselves as valuable members of a community is important in providing a sense of belonging.

Whether volunteers are being asked to serve other group members or the larger community, service is a tool that increases connection.

When sharing things that their congregations are doing to address issues surrounding loneliness, Pastor Kimberly Cheng, formerly of Clinton United Methodist Church (Clinton, Ohio), Jo Ann Branton, chair of the Act III Older Adults Ministry at Heritage Baptist Church (Cartersville, Georgia), and Rev. Mark Frailey, pastor of Coolspring Presbyterian (Mercer, Pennsylvania) and Union Presbyterian (Clintonville, Pennsylvania) churches, all talked about enlisting volunteer participants in their older adult ministries to reach out to other older adults who might be experiencing loneliness, loss, and disconnection.

By asking volunteers to serve by reaching out one-on-one in an intentional way, their ministries are seeking to strengthen connections between members and provide an enhanced sense of purpose for those initiating the contact.

Offer opportunities that engage creativity and encourage personal growth.

Involving participants in programming helps them develop new skills, insights, and connections.

Add to the impact of existing activities by exploring ways to increase opportunities for creativity. Trying something new in a supportive environment can spark creativity.

Providing time for participants to explore how particular topics speak to them personally and share their insights with others is one way to foster connection. First Baptist Church in Friendswood, Texas, held an adult vacation Bible school this year to provide purposeful interaction and intentional fellowship in a playful way for adults. While this wasn’t programming exclusively for older adults, the intentional engagement and opportunity for creativity makes it worth mentioning.

Foster opportunities for active social contact. 

In many traditions, the main religious service is one of passive engagement. Participants can attend and leave without ever actively engaging with other members of the faith community. This is a tempting proposition for a person who is feeling lonely.

Within faith communities, it is helpful to look at each opportunity for social contact in such a way that we maximize the potential for each participant while remaining sensitive to the needs of those choosing to avoid contact for other reasons, including social anxiety.

This may be as simple as having a team trained to welcome people as they enter the building or start conversations with people who are standing/sitting alone.

Encourage in-person activities. 

Even before COVID, research indicated that gathering in a supportive space was preferable to being alone. Post-COVID we know that there are aspects of in-person gathering that cannot be duplicated by technology. Though technology can be a tool in our strategy to reduce loneliness, nothing takes the place of in-person connection.

Calesa Leach, founder of CLS Ministries, created a Blue Christmas Vespers Service designed to address issues relating to the loss of a loved one, depression and isolation. Because of COVID related concerns the service was offered virtually in 2022. While the service was impactful via Zoom, Calesa plans to host it in person this year because she believes that an in-person service will provide a level of support and relationship building not obtainable by virtual attendance.

Train or enlist highly trained facilitators to lead activities. 

This may mean seeking out those who are already trained, offering additional training to current facilitators, or recruiting new facilitators who are willing to increase their skills through training.

Older adults value expertise and the confidence it inspires. Providing and expecting a certain level of expertise from facilitators promotes confidence in participants and lets them know that they are worth the time and energy required in preparation. It also lets the facilitators know that their job is important and valuable.

Include participants in the decision-making process at every level of planning and implementation.

By offering opportunities for everyone to feel invested in programming at every level we create more connections with the faith-based organization and with the people who are part of each activity.

Jennifer Dunfee, pastor at Lewinsville Presbyterian Church in McLean, Virginia, shared with me that Lewinsville Presbyterian switched names for a monthly program from “Single Seniors” to “Senior Lunches.” The group was formed about six years ago to support those who had lost a spouse.

As time passed, many of the older adults attending identified their loneliness as stemming from caregiving responsibilities of an ill spouse or one with cognitive decline/Alzheimer’s. These older adults expressed discomfort at attending a program entitled “single” since they aren’t but were seeking fellowship due to loneliness. By having the decision-making capacity to change the name, this group is intentionally engaging others to combat loneliness.

Engage in intentional relationship building.

Building relationships is not a side effect of attending a service or study. Building relationships is an intentional product of participation. The way we think about time and participation matters at every level.

University Baptist Church in Houston intentionally provides space for older adult men to build relationships. On Wednesday mornings the church hosts a group called “He Brews” to drink coffee and chat. The group is attractive to men from a variety of backgrounds who aren’t typically joiners, allowing them time and space to develop relationships with each other. 

Cooperate with other community organizations to strengthen connections and reach.

Every organization has things they do well and things they can improve. By tapping into the strengths of those around us and participating with them we all become stronger.

Jennifer Dunfee also shared that Lewinsville Presbyterian is planning a retreat for older adults entitled “Aging with Grace, the Third Third of Life” in cooperation with another local church. The goal is to connect older adults within the community while exploring issues of aging.

In his letter to the Ephesians chapter 4 beginning at verse 15 Paul says, “Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.”

The kind of growing and bodily formation that Paul portrays doesn’t happen by accident. With curious attention and thoughtful consideration we can intentionally engaging older adults and all who are lonely, joining them and holding them as part of the body of Christ, equipping others to serve them, and empowering all to join the work of loving God and loving others. This is an excellent way to live into the calling of building the body up in love.

Robin Johnson is the director of Mental Health and 55+ Adult Ministry at Clear Lake Presbyterian Church (Houston, Texas). In this role, she invites church members and those in the community to engage in mental wellness throughout their lives. She also implements programs and encourages habits that foster strong faith and community in later life. Robin is a former educator, administrator, and counselor.

This article originally appeared in the 2024 Older Adult Ministry Planning Guide.